But, what if I do not like the moment I am in?

Easy and Breezy, Peace in My Mind

When I think about being mindful, the phrase, "being in the moment," comes to mind. But here's the thing - not every moment is one that I necessarily want to "be" in. Some moments are not particularly pleasant, others even painful.

I am not a psychologist and know nothing more than my own perception and reality. Hokey as this is about to sound, here goes...

Perhaps it just is, that each moment does indeed happen for a reason. Some give pleasure and make us want to hold them forever. Others cause pain or fear. This is okay. The ability to feel, both pleasure and pain is what drives our passion, gives us purpose and allows for us to show compassion and empathy towards others. The opposing feelings we may hope to avoid creates the context for those feelings we crave to exist. Without pain, what is pleasure?

I think about embarking on a new career, falling in love, pursuing new interests. All require risk, vulnerability. The potential for pain becomes greater when our hearts are open. But keeping it shut is empty, numb.

I also think about addiction - be it sex, drinking or gambling, "pleasure," seeking behaviors. But eventually the body and mind build up a tolerance and it becomes more and more difficult to obtain the rush or feelings of joy these acts once provided. The thrill is gone, leaving one empty and without much feeling at all.

The point? To not engage in numbing behaviors, instead observe, experience and embrace each feeling with the understanding that the realm of emotions cycle in and out and those feelings we find painful, are both temporary and necessary prerequisites for greater meaning and mindfulness.

-Jennifer Fox



"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anais Nin